I love my glasses. No, not the reading ones with the faux tortoise-shell frames and little rhinestones (although I dearly love those, too) I love the special ones I have worn through out much of my life. My Pollyanna~perspective giving~ Rose Colored Glasses. Looking on the bright side, finding a silver lining, finding a win-win solution, giving the benefit of the doubt, seeing the good. Patience, perseverance.
Just this week my specially made, perfectly fitted prescription was knocked off. Hard. What happens when that view becomes blurry? When hope fades into something less bright? What really happened was that the view became suddenly all too clear.
The view of my world has shifted…again. What I believed is not true , is not what I would wish…once again. I won’t deny it, nor should I. The glasses have come off and the truth is that my world has changed…again. What I thought my family was immune to has changed my sense of security forever….again.
I am thankful for the people who intervened, who did not turn away, who saw the signs and said no, not ok, not for you. Because of their courage it is time for greater change, greater growth, greater accountability, greater faith.
Did I see it coming… no. The glasses were on and I was happily humming along in life. I would never have suspected that , after all we have weathered together that this choice would be made. Have I spent the requisite time thinking I should have seen, should have done more, what if, if only? YES! Have the voices of doubt, failure and fear tried to raise their ugly raspy voice to out cry all the rest? YES!
But that was yesterday! To listen to me then you would think that I was in the midst of dire tragedy. Unfortunate, yes. Tragedy, no. Tragedy is losing your brother, your father, your baby. Tragedy is your wife or your mother being hospitalized. Not knowing where your child is. Those are tragedies.
Today~ head up, forward ho! The Voice of Truth now drowns out all the rest. What is staring me in the face is Life. Free will, choices, mistakes, consequences, rewards, repentance and Forgiveness. Knowing that we do the best we can and hope to instill the best we can. That by faith, patience and perseverance we can impact another life along the way.
And the most wonderful, freeing truth, this time we are not in this alone. This new season of life has been a lot about learning to let trusted people know the struggles and needs. Learning to be honest and transparent which means being vulnerable.
Being vulnerable….there are days when this tender little heart can hardly bear the thought. Then there are days when this little heart is humbled and grateful because a friend calls when she senses something is wrong. I’m grateful that others rally round with encouragement, stories, the tissue box and hope. We are all in this together, connected by Life.
The one certainty in this life is~~uncertainty. Life is ,well, life. Unpredictable. A fast ride full of blossoming hopes and dreams, broken promises and even heart-break. Along the way the greatest lesson I have kept is that the only way to have any certainty in the midst of great uncertainty is by giving my life AND my heart daily to Christ.
Surrender….daily. Submission…daily. Step out in Obedience…moment by moment. Following the One Voice that whispers loudest above all the rest.
That says softly ‘ head up, do not retreat , walk it out’…no matter what the critics might say… and every once in a while I feel quite certain I will put on my lovely rose-colored glasses. The good news is that I am learning that when they get disheveled or scuffed up, I have people, trusted people, with whom I am free to be vulnerable and true. It is indeed a good life.
With 20/20 hindsight and a heart wide open~ Shandra
Linking here:The Story Teller