A week ago or so, in Monday Motivation -Reset, I told you about “*Patty”, (not her real name*) who encouraged me to keep writing & posting.
Really what she’s encouraging me to do?…continue to be Vulnerable.
I hate that.
No, you don’t understand I REALLY , REALLY , really hate that. Capital V. again? um no. Thanks just the same.
Coffee with my friend Marlene one week later-Sunday after church. She looked me in the eye across the table and said “You’re layers are showing” or something like that. (i think it was about building walls or some such nonsense) She used that V word.
Guess what. I HATE THAT! no, i am not shouting! 😉
“Patty” and I had chatted about the same thing the previous week in her office. Over the years layers upon layers can make it difficult on trusting, receiving, Believing. We were actually talking about someone else…I thought.
I had chosen “Patty” because I sensed she could do the job. Showing her around the family home those months ago – preparing for sale- she didn’t bat an eye at a truly daunting task. She didn’t know any of our history so she had no bias or ties.
My father died in September, 2013. Suddenly. In Texas. My mother has chosen to remain in Texas. My brother living in the family home in Oregon for the previous 5+ years, so it would be occupied while they were in the South 6 months of the year. I was chosen to make the sale arrangements because I would do the job with compassion , efficiency, patience and on time ; but do the job, including making the necessary (ie walking down memory lane…with a broom) decisions. 40 years of living in one home= lots of memories and lots of Stuff.
After a very eventful couple of months attending the memorial services of 2 neighbors of 30+ years, a falling out with my brother the previous week regarding his thought on my (lacking) level of compassion in the selling of the Family Home, another teen death in our small Central Oregon Community, trying to stay ahead and meeting everyone’s time lines in a fast paced work & social life…Breathe. The realization that a major misunderstanding had occurred (which had been interpreted as a snub) and lots more- I sprung a leak. My capacity had reached max. Release. I puddled up, spilled over.
Stopping by “Patty’s” office in the Valley, Sunday a week ago at this writing, I once again felt there was something kindred. We chatted. Two Solo, Successful Women . She’ll be 70 shortly, which you would never know; still running 5 miles, active in community & career, gorgeous hair. At a time when women stayed married no-matter-what she made a daring choice 30 years ago to divorce a man she thought she would spend the rest of her life with – until it became unbearable & she was dying. The parallels in her life & mine are remarkable. Her wisdom in talking of layers (actually not about either of us but that’s a later story) & wall building were astute. She was spot on. Momentarily embarrassed at sharing with a client I assure her it is meant to be. We parted one week ago at this writing, I, lighter & brighter than in weeks.
She got it. Because she had lived it. I was ready to go to the now empty-spotlessly clean-for-sale-Family Home, in the Home Town & face the again whispering skeletons calling from those long, dark closets.
to be continued…
…but in the interim check these resources-
linking with Hazel Moon who weekly hosts ‘Tell me A True Story Blog Hop’. Check out the Stories of Hope and God’s Unending Grace. You’ll be happy You did~~