Shandra Lee. With Heart Wide Open. A Miracle In The Making.

Parallels, Puddles, People & Calling Closets p1

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A week ago or so,  in Monday Motivation -Reset, I told you about “*Patty”, (not her real name*)  who encouraged me to keep writing & posting.

Really what she’s encouraging me to do?…continue to be Vulnerable.

I hate that.

No, you don’t understand I REALLY , REALLY , really hate that. Capital V. again? um no. Thanks just the same.

Coffee with my friend Marlene one week later-Sunday after church. She looked me in the eye across the table and said “You’re layers are showing” or something like that. (i think it was about building walls or some such nonsense) She used that V word.

Guess what. I HATE THAT! no, i am not shouting! 😉

“Patty” and I had chatted about the same thing the previous week in her office. Over the years layers upon layers can make it difficult on trusting, receiving, Believing. We were actually talking about someone else…I thought.

I had chosen “Patty” because I sensed she could do the job. Showing her around the family home those months ago – preparing for sale- she didn’t bat an eye at a truly daunting task. She didn’t know any of our history so she had no bias or ties.

My father died in September, 2013. Suddenly. In Texas. My mother has chosen to remain in Texas. My brother living in the family home in Oregon for the previous 5+ years, so it would be occupied while they were in the South 6 months of the year. I was chosen to make the sale arrangements because  I would do the job with compassion , efficiency, patience and on time ; but do the job, including making the necessary (ie walking down memory lane…with a broom) decisions. 40 years of living in one home= lots of memories and lots of Stuff.

After a very eventful couple of months attending the memorial services of 2 neighbors of 30+ years, a falling out with my brother the previous week regarding his thought on my (lacking)  level of compassion in the selling of the Family Home,  another teen death in our small Central Oregon Community, trying to stay ahead and meeting everyone’s  time lines in a fast paced work & social life…Breathe. The realization that a major misunderstanding had occurred (which had been interpreted as a snub) and lots more- I sprung a leak. My capacity had reached max. Release. I puddled up, spilled over.

Stopping by “Patty’s” office in the Valley, Sunday a week ago at this writing, I once again felt there was something kindred. We chatted. Two Solo, Successful Women . She’ll be 70 shortly, which you would never know; still running 5 miles, active in community & career, gorgeous hair. At a time when women stayed married no-matter-what she made a daring choice 30 years ago to divorce a man she thought she would spend the rest of her life with – until it became unbearable & she was dying. The parallels in her life & mine are remarkable.  Her wisdom in talking of layers (actually not about either of us but that’s a later story) & wall building were astute. She was spot on.  Momentarily embarrassed at sharing with a client I assure her it is meant to be. We parted one week ago at this writing, I, lighter & brighter than in weeks.

She got it. Because she had lived it. I was ready to go to the now empty-spotlessly clean-for-sale-Family Home, in the Home Town & face the again whispering skeletons calling from those long, dark closets.

to be continued…

Shandra

…but in the interim check these resources-

Brené Brown: The power of vulnerability | Video on TED.com

http://www.giftedforleadership.com/2013/08/avoiding_pitfalls_in_ministry.html …

 

linking with Hazel Moon who weekly hosts ‘Tell me A True Story Blog Hop’. Check out the Stories of Hope and God’s Unending Grace. You’ll be happy You did~~

Http://letmetelluastory.blogspot.com/

10 Replies to “Parallels, Puddles, People & Calling Closets p1”

  1. I am so sorry about the loss of your Father! I am very sorry my condolences are so late, I had no idea. If there is anything I can do for you please call on me.

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  2. Oh so very blessed to know such a strong, loving, brave, victorious woman of God. You are amazing. Can you see the smile on our Fathers face. And that he is saying come sit with me awhile. He loves you so much. As many of us also do. Good job dear friend. Hugs

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  3. Thanks for sharing your vulnerable heart. I’m so glad you have been matched with a “Patty” and a God directed perfect fit 🙂 Soldier on, my friend. Soldier on!

    The following is a quote that I have recently tried to wrap around my life. I don’t know that it relates directly to what you were sharing, in which case I’m just simply sharing back at you 🙂

    “Allow your life to be controlled by godly principles and it will become an expression of those plans.”
    -Solly Ozrovech

    Blessings and may God orchestrate the timing of your memories – Holly

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    1. Hello My Dear Friend Holly. xox Thank YOU for sharing your Wisdom & your quote. 🙂 Godly principles, Godly orchestration. His plans. His Memories. Yes & Amen. Blessings to You.

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  4. It fell my lot to sell my mother’s place for her, but fortunately it was not the “family home with all its memories.” Some of her possessions we kept for the family, but most everything went in a gigantic yard sale. People from the church had first choice and we kept mother at our place while the sale was going one. We thought it best for her not to watch her things go, but actually she had released them all unconditionally. May you continue to be “V” as even when it hurts it is transparent. Thank you for sharing with us here at “Tell Me a Story.”

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank You so much, Hazel. I really appreaciate your Story much more than you can imagine. Visiting her later this month in The South & Dad’s grave & new Headstone. New Memories. Bless you and Yours.

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